Need a Laugh?

So I wrote about all the stresses of teaching. I want to shine a light on the positive side…the kids! I cannot even put into words how much my students truly mean to me. I spend most of my time with them. I spend more time with them then I do my own family during the day. If I didn’t love the kids with my whole heart,  there is no way I could get up and go to work everyday. Here is just a glimpse at some of the things they say (*DISCLAIMER: I teach emotionally disturbed students. Some things that I find funny are incredibly inappropriate but that is the nature of the beast and I wouldn’t have it any other way. You will never survive if you don’t learn to laugh. Also, when they are angry they will use any and all information against you so it is always best to give them very little information about our personal lives. This sometimes leads to hilarious assumptions. See example one)

Student one : Ms. J gotta go on whitepeople.com and find a husband 
Student two : Ms. J don’t wanna get married…she don’t wanna be tied to the same man forever. Shoot me neither!
Student three: You know, I think she dates a teacher upstairs
Student four: uh no! Ms. J would NOT date him… Girl got taste

Student: ” Ms. J, I’m your favorite right?”

Me: You’re ONE of my favorites

Student: “oh yeah, I’m ya number one favorite, first round pick babay”

Me: That’s not what I said….

“Ms. J you got a hole in your nose? You’re a rockstar for real”

The kids collaborated with staff to throw me a surprise birthday party. They gave everyone a different job (someone had to get balloons, someone else had to buy a card, etc.) They sent one staff to get a gluten free dessert. He came back with vanilla cake.

Female Student: “Man, you gotta be single! Don’t you know anything? Girls gotta have chocolate! Go fix it” He went back and bought gluten free brownies.

” Ms. J, I like you today, you didn’t annoy me. Good job girl! “

Me: Listen, just calm your soul

Student: Ha-Ha jokes on you, I don’t have a soul!

One of my students was new at our residential facility.  The conversation went like this:

Me: So what got you sent here

Student: Armed robbery, burglary

Me: So I have to worry about you stealing from me?

Student: Nah, you a teacher. Everybody know you don’t got shit

While learning about mythology  “Yo, Zeus was a THOT for real”  (THOT stands for “that hoe over there”)

Amused? This is only about a weeks worth of comments. Trust me, I will have plenty of more gems to share with you all. Happy Wednesday!

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